New York, NY | July 15, 2009
Dear Bravo, Sarah Jessica Parker, Nick Gilhool, Magical Elves and Pretty Matches,
You don’t know me yet, but we share two things: a goal and an impasse. You are looking for an “emerging or mid-career artist with a unique, powerful voice that demands a bigger stage” for your Untitled Art Project.
My girlfriend thinks I am perfect for this.
Here’s the rub. Your New York casting call, where I live and paint, often in the buff (see above), is this weekend. As it happens, so is my cousin’s wedding in North Carolina, and family is top priority (I can get a note from my Mom if it helps.)
I am an artist first, a business and marketing man second. Round one of casting is a cattle call to quickly sift through the garbage. All I ask is the opportunity to be rejected alongside everybody else. Just a quick coffee with someone in your casting department to show the goods.
What you will not get: some jerk-off, trying to stab everyone in the back to drop his career to live on reality TV. What you will get: a passionate artist who left his job as an ad-exec to chase the dream.
I want to exploit this opportunity as much as you want to exploit the cast for high entertainment value. Let’s use each other.
We leave for North Carolina at 2:00 PM tomorrow – let’s do lunch.